Naruto: You've GOT To Be Kidding!
by Mistress of Madness
Summary: So, one moment I'm just casually crossing the road and the next I get run over by a truck. An angel comes to inform me that if I wanted to wake up, I would have to prove myself in a mission. I'm okay with that, except… I have to do it as Haruno Sakura? What the hell?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

I don't know why or what I did to deserve this. I've been a good person in general. Sure, I've had fights with my sibling, but that's natural. I've talked back to my mom, but every teenager does that. I may hate 78% of my classmates, but I held that in since I didn't want any enemies. I may have gotten a couple extra cents from my mom's wallet even when I just asked for a dollar, but that was just in case the money didn't fit. I swear, but I was just influenced at school.

I've been a fairly good person. I help out with the chores at home, I've got a ton of friends and treat them as family, I always slept early, I never complained(except for this one time when my mom was forcing me to wear pink…), I say 'Hello' to the elderly widow living next door every time I see her, I was consistently in the top 5, I only watched anime after studying, I was always back before curfew, and I always put the change back in my mom's wallet. So can someone tell me why the hell I _died_?

* * *

_Hours earlier…_

* * *

"Jade, your school bus's here!" I heard my mom shout from the first floor. Our house had only two floors and an attic, and I was currently in my room, double checking my things just in case I'd forgotten something. After making sure I hadn't, I ran down the stairs and kissed my mom goodbye before hopping on the bus.

"Morning, Watson." I greeted the bus driver. He smiled at me and nodded in return.

I walked to my usual seat at the back of the driver's and placed my bag down on space next to me. The bus wasn't packed yet, but I wanted to make sure that Marie'd have a place to sit at later on.

Marie had been my best friend since kindergarten. She was one of the people I actually liked. No, that's not it. I loved Marie like my own sister. We've been inseparable from the moment our eyes met. We used to have sleepovers all the time, but alas school had decided to put an end to that. We still have them at times, of course. Marie was the only person who knew me like my mom did, and vice versa.

I stared out the window and sighed. Why do I feel like something bad's gonna happen today?

We stopped by house after house, and soon enough only the space beside wasn't filled yet. Luckily, Marie's was the next stop.

"Morning, Morgan!" Marie greeted as cheerfully as ever when she got on and claimed the seat beside me.

"Morning to you too, Tarver." I greeted back, smiling. And thus our conversation continued to school…

* * *

It was lunch, and I was waiting for Marie. She was talking to our other classmates and laughing along with them. See, Marie was a fairly funny and approachable person so her circle of friends was huge, while I'm the quiet one.

People think I'm very serious and am no fun since I usually have a tired look on my face and listen to the teacher, but once I get to know them, they realize that they're wrong. Doesn't put me in the same place as Marie though…

We're both generally shy, but since my ties with people extended towards people in other classes(mostly because of anime), I've made friends with seniors, something Marie could never do. Oh yeah, I'm shy. Very shy. Even just reciting an answer in class makes my heart pound, but then again, I've never been a fan of crowds…

Marie approached me then, she was still giggling. "C'mon, let's go!" She grabbed my arm and dragged me to the school cafeteria. Once we had gotten our trays, she told me to stay in front of her. I looked at her oddly, but did as she said.

I felt awkward since I wasn't used to being in front, but_ then_ I took notice of the person in front of me. It was CJ, a senior guy who also happened to be my crush. Looked back at Marie and gave her a failed glare. The grin on my face was wide, I could feel it. She gave two thumbs up.

I laughed. "Idiot…" She laughed as well.

"Oh!" CJ suddenly turned around and smiled at me. "Hi, Jade!"

"Hi…!" I smiled back and waved awkwardly before turning to the woman on the counter. "I'll take a hamburger and some iced tea." She gave me it.

CJ looked at me, dumbfounded. "_That's all_ your gonna eat?" He pointed at my tray.

I nodded. "I'm not a fan of long lines."

"But you can't keep eating that way…" He said, concerned.

"You're one to speak," I pointed at his tray which had an entire batch of cookies and a burger.

"Hey! I still eat more than you do…" He whined. "Well, I gotta go, see ya around!" He waved before walking off.

Settle down, butterflies.

I walked towards a table at the far end of the cafeteria, with Marie following suit. First thing I did was squeal.

Marie laughed. "Jade, you're blushing!" She teased. My already wide grin widened.

"Sh-shut up!"

"Says the grinning one." She grinned, but hers was a sly one. I just ate my food.

* * *

Marie and I were separated for our next class, so that isn't any fun. I still have to do my best, though. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I'll get excused for tennis practise.

And excused I was, so I asked Danielle, a close friend of mine, to lend me her notes later on. She said "Okay."

* * *

I rushed to change my attire and ran to the courts. Our captain and CJ were already there.

Our captain, Alexis, was awesome at tennis, but not as awesome as the characters in Prince of Tennis were. She does, however, have the ability to do the Zero Shiki Drop Shot. I've only seen her do it once, but that was an accident. Ever since then she's been practicing it, trying to get it to perfection. It seems very likely, but she's too used to holding herself back so that has failed. A lot.

CJ was our captain's cousin and doubles partner, so naturally they were together. Tennis wasn't how we got to know each other, since I've never actually talked to him, and then the aforementioned friend dragged me with her, and introduced us to each other in the process.

"Hey, Jade!" CJ ran up to me as we were doing laps. I was always leading since I was faster than everyone, so keeping pace was hard. But as I looked at him and smiled, he seemed to be doing it effortlessly.

He grinned. "Don't tell me our little Thunder's getting slow," CJ teased. I grinned at the challenge. I sped up.

"Catch me if you can!" I challenged. He laughed and tried to do so. Eventually, he did, even though that was thirty laps later and we were a mere 20 feet away from finishing point.

I let myself fall to the court(clay, by the way) and panted hard. "What… laps are the others… on?" I asked our coach.

"On the twenty sixth," he replied, "with Alexis leading."

"Al's gonna give us a scolding later." He told me. "So… how about a match?"

I grinned and stretched an arm out. "Pull me up." He did just that and we proceeded with the match. We agreed to just have one set since we were both tired, and a couple minutes later he won 7 games to 5. While I'm fast, he was strong and my arms weren't strong enough to return most of his shots.

Practice ended not much later. After I'd washed up and changed back, I went to Danielle and borrowed her notebook before proceeding the Science lab for the last class of the day.

* * *

I dislike pricking myself.

Allow me to explain. We are currently blood-typing in Biology and I fail at pricking. Seriously, I've pricked myself like 7 times already and I'm not bleeding enough to figure out what my type is.

I JUST GOT FROM PRACTICE, DAMN IT!

Well, that's until our teacher decided to let a guy in the class prick me.

"AH!" I screamed the moment the needle hit my finger (he was using this machine thingy) and retracted it. I was laughing in relief and from weakness, because I can only last so long.

I put my blood on the two slides and put the appropriate chemicals on each one and mixed them. Our teacher looked at the slides before handing me some tissue paper for the bleeding (Why not cotton?).

"Miss Morgan, you are type AB." She told me. I grinned.

Sweetness! I can receive from all types!

* * *

"See you tomorrow, Jade!" Marie told me as I got off the bus. I smiled and waved at her before heading in.

"Sis!" I heard my youngest brother call out. He was running down the stairs and then jumped. I caught him.

"What up, Squirt?" I asked.

Travis gave me puppy eyes. "Could you help me with my homework?"

I laughed and set him down. "Of course! But first let me copy some notes." I ruffled his hair and then ran up to my room where I changed into a pair of shorts and a white t-shirt. After that, I went to Travis's room and got to telling him how to solve his maths homework while I did mine.

"Jade, would you mind a can of Sprite from the vending machine nearby? I need it for cooking." My mom told me once I had left the room.

I nodded. "Sure thing, where's the money?"

"On the table in the kitchen." She replied. I nodded and then did as she told me.

I crossed the street then went left 5 blocks, coming face-to-face with the machine and purchasing one can of Sprite. I grabbed it and started juggling it in my hand, with the other tucked in my pocket.

"Hey, I'm pretty good at this juggling thing, maybe I can be a bartender someday!" I said with a grin as I crossed the street, but then it vanished. "Yeah, right. As if!" I laughed at the thought.

But then, I heard the honking.

I turned to look at the speeding ten-wheeler truck that was headed right for me.

You know that whole slow-mo, frozen in place thing? Load of bull. It's really just:

**HOOOONNNNNKKKKK**!

_Screeeeeeeeeecccchhhhh_!

Hit!

I was sent flying, needless to say. And then, I hit the ground tumbling, causing me to hit my head on the hard tarmac and probably some dislocated bones.

* * *

_Present…_

* * *

So that's how it happened.

I started feeling regret then. So now all my dreams are crushed, I'm never going to see the people I love ever again, and I never even got to thank my mom for everything. I never got to tell my dad to just die in a shithole for what he'd done to us and to my mom. Travis was going to grow up without me. My mom's going to be torn.

She was just recovering from when dad left us and now this happens to me. I feel guilty for putting her through this pain. And how was she going to raise Travis now? How can she live through it?

I wanted to laugh at the unfairness of it all, but my body wouldn't oblige. I couldn't see that clearly anymore, either. And my ears won't work. So… what? It's all just going to end like this? My body numb with pain in the complete darkness?

"Not quite." I heard a voice despite my deafness. The voice was lovely, as if singing, it was also light and elegant. All of a sudden I saw light. A man in a pure white robe was standing in front of me. Hi hair was ebony black and his eyes were a light gray color.

I opened my mouth to speak, but I was immediately silenced by him. "You're not quite dead, yet."

"How's that so?" I asked.

He smiled at me. "Since we're still busy sorting the load of people dying everyday, you get to prove yourself in a mission." Only then did I notice the gigantic wings spurting out behind him.

"Excuse me?"

He – I should really ask his name – laughed. "We know how much you want to come back to your family, your regrets, and basically if you pass this mission, you get to wake up and fulfil them. Of course, we have already weighed the good things you've done and the bad, and that is exactly why you have this second chance."

I nodded in understanding. "So you mean, I'm gonna fall into coma?"

The angel nodded. "Exactly!" He seemed proud of me, but then his mood darkened. "However, time will pass while you are doing your mission and your family will age…"

"Then I just have to finish it quickly." I told him, then a thought came to mind. "Say, are the dying the only ones going through this?" Stupid question…

"Actually, no." Say what? "Those who have sinned too much go through this whole mission thing as well, only they do it in their dreams so time barely passes for them. For example, 2 years for you could just be 3 hours of sleep for them."

I nodded again. "So how do I go about this?"

"We send you off to a world, you start of at a random age, depending on how much your body needs to adjust to that environment, and then you receive your mission."

"I see…" No wonder he was distraught by the passing of time. "Say, what is your name?"

He smiled. "Gabriel."

As in the messenger-of-God-Gabriel? Then this must be a really important matter…

Nah. I'm never an important matter.

I weighed my options. Say I start out in this new world at the age of 6 and finish this mission 8 years later… Wow… long time, but worth it if I see my family again. Say I start at the day of birth, finish it 16 years later… Well, that's dumb. My mom'll be over 60 and Travis is gonna be 23.

Yeesh…

"I'll do it." I said a moment later. "I just hope they don't decide to kill me."

Gabriel laughed. "They wouldn't." He waved a hand and a portal thingy appeared. "We'll call you when the preparations are done."

All of a sudden, there was nothing but a blinding light.

* * *

When I opened my eyes, I was in a dark room floating. I regretted looking down for all I could see was a bunch of doctors and _my_ bloody body.

Yeah, I'm outta here.

Outside were my mom and brother plus some dude. He was probably the one who ran over me. The guy was pacing to and fro and then after 3 laps he looked at the door. My mom was crying and Trav was bugging her about where I was.

Well… This is awkward.

I went near Trav and sat down cross-legged. "'Sup, Squirt?"

He froze. "Sis?"

Holy crap! "Who else?"

He began looking around. "Where are you? I can't see you."

"I'm right here." He faced me. "Listen Trav, I'm about to go some place really far and I won't be coming back soon but I _will_ come back. Got that?" Trav nodded. I smiled. "I need you to stay strong for mom, she doesn't know what I've told you, I don't want you telling her either. Be a good boy, okay?"

Travis sniffed. "Okay."

I patted his head and he flinched. Hm…

"You'll come back, right?"

"Absolutely." I nodded.

Gabriel appeared then. "Everything has been prepared, we should proceed…"

I nodded at him before turning back to Travis. "Alright, big sis has got to go now. Take care of mom, okay? And be a good boy."

Travis sniffed and started to rub his eyes. "I will. Bring me souvenir, okay?"

I laughed. "Sure thing."

And then I was pulled back to the light.

* * *

I looked up at Gabriel. He was… taller… No, no. I just shrank.

Gabriel looked down at me and chuckled. "We think that you will like the world you will be sent to very much." He led me to a big pair of double doors. They were painted white with golden borders and intricate designs. "You'll receive your mission when you get there." The doors flew open.

And I was sucked in.

* * *

I rolled over to the side and tried to get more sleep, which failed. My entire body hurt, and this didn't feel like my bed at all. I got up and yawned. Damn did it feel good to stretch.

Then I noticed my surroundings.

Everything was pink. Bloody pink. Of ALL the colors in the world, it was pink.

Wait…

Memories flooded into my mind. The truck, Gabriel, the hospital, my mom, Travis, Marie, The dude who ran over me…

I wanted to cry. I should cry, but then I saw the bigass mirror.

I stared and stared and stared and stared at what was supposed to be my reflection. There was no way in hell I looked like that. I looked nothing like that!

I know how I look like and there was absolutely no way in hell that I looked anything like Sakura Haruno!

* * *

I was sitting down at the foot of Sakura's bed with my arms wrapped around my legs and panting hard.

This wasn't happening… This wasn't happening… This wasn't happening… This wasn't happening…

I heard the door slide open, but I didn't care. Not when I was in a pink room as a girl with pink hair.

"Sakura, sweetie, are you okay…?"

Not when this woman I didn't even know called me 'sweetie'

Because this just wasn't happening.

But it was. And there was nothing I could do about it.

I looked up at the woman whom I assumed to be her mom with my teary eyes. "I hate pink…"

She looked at me like I had grown two heads.

* * *

Needless to say, I was taken out shopping.

I grinned at the possibilities. Because for one thing, I could turn Sakura goth.

As awesome as that sounds, I'm not gonna do that. But I won't be wearing any pink item from now on, that's for sure.

Hours later, Sakura's room was devoid of anything pink aside from her hair. I also found a note that had _my_ name on it.

_Mission: Prevent Sasuke Uchiha from leaving Konoha. _

_Additional note: It would be advisable for you to start training, NOW._

You've GOT to be kidding!

I stared at the piece of paper, dumbfounded. Were they stupid or something? That mission would take ages! And not to mention the fact that I'm gonna do it as this…

girl who's supposedly in love with the guy!

No. Just no.

…

I don't have a choice, do I?

Fine…


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

I brushed what was now my hair into a high ponytail, leaving out the side bangs, and put on a green long-sleeved shirt on as well as a pair of white shorts. This was my first day in the Ninja Academy and I wanted to look decent at least.

"Buh-bye!" I waved as I left the house.

Sakura's mom smiled at me. "Have fun sweetie!" She waved back and I left.

In the short while that I've been here, I figured out one major problem: Naruto is in love with Sakura. That is going to be very disturbing… And annoying.

I facepalmed. Ugh! Can somebody tell me why I wasn't turned into somebody else? Ino would've been a better choice, really. I could use her Mind Transfer Jutsu to just stop him then and there.

Speaking of Ino… Don't they hate each other? But that was because they both like Sasuke and that's not gonna be happening, so won't something replace that? I hope not, that'd make my life totally easier.

I made my way to the classroom and sat in the only empty chair left, which just so happened to be next to Sasuke.

"Good morning! I'm Sasuke Uchiha, who're you?" He greeted me cheerfully with a smile and all that.

Too bloody cute!

"My name's Sakura Haruno, nice to meet you!" I smiled back.

"That's a pretty name."

"Thanks! I really like your name too, it's cool!"

He blushed. "Really?"

I nodded. "Uh-huh!"

"Th-thank you…"

Argh! He's too cute right now! I wanna pinch his cheeks!

No, no, no, no, no… This isn't the time for fangasms!

Okay, storyline check! Itachi hadn't massacred their clan yet. That's good. I can befriend Sasuke this way.

I looked around and saw Naruto at the very back of the room, all hunched up and sad… I headdesked. Might as well talk to him later.

"Are you alright?" Sasuke asked.

I nodded. "I'm just annoyed…"

He looked sad. "It's not my fault, is it? I'm sor-"

"No!" I blurted out hastily. "It's not you fault, I swear! I just have to deal with something!"

"Are you sure?" Oh, God! Why are children like this!?

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm sure"

He beamed. "Yay!"

I sighed. Let's get this show on the road…

* * *

By the time class ended, I've acquainted myself with Ino. She approached me at free period with a bigass smile on her face and her arm extended and asked me to go play with her. Hm… she probably did that because I was alone… Meh! What works, works.

When I left the building, I saw Naruto all alone, looking like a kicked puppy…

Argh! Stop being so bloody pathetic damn it!

"Hello…" I said as I approached him. "My name's Sakura Haruno, what's yours?" Ugh! I just know that this is gonna come back and bite me in the ass someday…

He looked up. "Naruto… Uzumaki…"

I smiled at him. "Well, Naruto, I'll see you at school tomorrow!" With that, I waved and went home. Hopefully, that cheered him up a little…

"Sakura-chan!" I heard someone call, so I turned around. It was Sasuke, he was grinning at me and had his hand held by Itachi.

"Hello!" I waved at them.

Sasuke looked up at Itachi. "She's the one I was talking about! Her name's Sakura Haruno! She said my name was cool!"

Okay… The OOCness is beginning to bug me…

"Oh, really?" Itachi looked at me speculatively and then smiled. "I'm Itachi, Sasuke's older brother. It's good to see that he's already made some friends."

I bowed. "It's nice to meet you!"

"Do you want to come play with us?" Sasuke asked.

Perfect! But… "I'm not sure… My mom might get mad if I get home late…" I pouted.

"Don't worry! Itachi's gonna explain it to your mom! Right?" Sasuke looked at Itachi again.

He nodded. "I'm sure I can explain it to her."

I beamed. "Yay!"

* * *

Itachi did manage to explain it to her. And she looked happy that I was able to make friends on my first day. Yay! Not.

If I didn't know the plotline, I probably would've never expected Itachi to massacre their clan. But I did, so I do. And it makes me sad that I can't prevent this.

Yes, I'm supposed to stop Sasuke from leaving Konoha, and stopping the massacre would most likely help by a hell lot. But I'm just a kid, so I can't.

I sighed. This was just so frustrating. Whatever was the easiest way to do it was also the most impossible one!

You know what? I'm gonna go train.

Okay, so how does one channel their chakra? Medititation? Meditation.

Now… how to meditate?

…

This is useless!

Okay… I am calm.

I looked at the tree in front of me then closed my eyes, only letting the image of the tree remain in my mind.

Focus now…

I drew back my arm and clenched my fist.

Breathe in, breathe out. Channel.

I ran for the tree as I felt the chakra surging in my arm and hit it.

"OW!" I held back the tears as I stroke my sore hand. "Owowowowowowow!" I blew on it then started shaking it around.

Note to self: Be sure of the amount of chakra next time.

Okay, let's try that again.

* * *

Several retries later, I was sprawled out on the ground with crushed hands and tired as hell reminding me that I am currently just a six-year old kid with the mentality of a 16-year old.

I went home just in time for dinner and went to the room and passed out the moment my head hit the pillow.

* * *

Travis understood yet he didn't. His sister had told him that she was going away, yet her body was right there on that hospital bed, hooked up to machines. Her face looked so peaceful, as if she was having such a good dream and never wanted to wake up. She was there, yet she wasn't. And he missed her, a lot.

He missed the way she ruffled his hair, the way she would comfort him, play with him, teach him things, laugh at his jokes, their fights, their team battles, their partying, and most of all, he missed her presence that just made him feel so right.

The little boy looked around the room. His mother was just staring into space looking like a zombie, the guy who ran over her was sitting next to his mother, trying to comfort her and at the same time apologize, and then there was him sitting on his sister's bedside and holding her hand to let her know that they were there to support her. He wanted to cry, but he didn't. He had to stay strong, like what he promised his sister, so he placed her hand atop his head and ruffled his hair with it.

It just didn't feel the same…

* * *

I shot up from bed as if I had a bad dream. It's like there's this thought that's gnawing at the back of my brain, haunting me. I don't like it.

"Sakura, time for breakfast." Her mother said through the door.

"Coming!" I replied as I got off the bed.

I remember how my mom used to wake up. She'd grab my blanket which made me crash to the floor. I usually got up after that, but when I don't, she gets my brother to pour ice cold water over me. After that, we'd have a good laugh.

It had already been two weeks from when I got here. Gabriel said that I'd like this place. He was wrong. I hate it. All I want to do is go home and be with my family.

But this was the only to do that, so I have to.

* * *

I went to school in a glum mood and just stared off into space the whole day. Sasuke seemed worried, but I didn't speak to him. He's probably thinking it's his fault now. I gotta fix that later.

On a side note, Naruto seemed happier lately. I noticed him staring at me when he thought I wasn't looking.

Ugh, so this is where it begins? Right then. I gotta be prepared for that.

Lunch came and I still haven't conversed with anyone. I sat on a bench and sighed. I'd forgotten my lunch back at the house and was now foodless.

"Sakura-chan…"

I looked up and saw Sasuke looking down at me with a worried looked on his face.

"Hello, Sasuke-kun." I said monotonously.

"Can I sit beside you?"

I nodded. He sat down and opened up his lunch box.

"How come you're not eating?" He asked.

"I forgot my lunch at home."

He placed his lunch box on my lap. "You can have half of mine if you want…."

I looked at his smiling face and then at the food on my lap. Before I knew it, I was smiling. "Thank you…"

We ate in silence for a few minutes. After wards, when he had stood up to leave. I tugged on his shirt.

"Sasuke-kun, why do you bother yourself with me?"

He looked back at me and smiled very brightly. "Because you're my best friend."

And I was taken back.

I hadn't been much of a friend, really. We talked and we played, but we're simply kids that stuff is natural, so what had I done to get to that status so quickly? Why are kids such a puzzle? I've never been good with them, not really. Sure I have a brother, but with other people's kids, I just didn't know what to do. The reason I get along with everyone is because I adjust my personality based on theirs; I've experienced being crazy, then going to a brat that hated everything, then someone who just seemed to be so bloody optimistic, it didn't even make sense anymore. I guess it's because kids haven't really gotten a settled personality yet. I mean Sasuke goes from being the sweet boy he is now to this genius, cool jerkface-ish, and Naruto maybe this lonely boy now, but look at how many friends he gets in the future!

Am I his best friend simply because I know what he will be like in the future? That didn't seem fair at all…

* * *

**Bah. A/N**

**This is shorter than I'd like it to be; but I've run out of stuff to put in this thing. **

**So in this chapter, we here from Travis and some of Jade's thoughts about certain things.**

**Now, I'd like to hear your opinion so far on her since you've gotten a better light on her personality.**

**Also, thre'll be a couple more chapter 'til the main storyline, but you've probably already figured that out.**

**One thing, Guest who signed their review as 'JR' I am supposing that yiu are my classmate. I fyou are, then HELLO! And if you're not, I'm sorry for the mix-up, but hello anyway and thanks for the review! :3**

'**Till next time mah peeps!**

***ninja vanishes* **


End file.
